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Mindfulness and Counseling
Why be full of mind when we could be mindful?
Recent research has suggested that there is more to living well than just diet and exercise. Many health providers now recommend two additional areas of focus necessary for overall wellbeing: sleep and mindfulness. Talking about the mindfulness in counseling sessions tends to generate the most questions. The most concrete definition comes from this site, “Mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us.” This can be practiced in a variety of ways. You can practice meditation, find a state of flow, or even just be intentional about everyday activities. After you learn how to mindful in counseling, you can start to practice it anywhere.
Why Practice Mindfulness?
In order to develop motivation to add one more habit to your day, let’s review the evidence for the value of being mindful.
Cognitive Health
Studies suggest that even those relatively new to meditation practice demonstrate reduced distraction from unwanted thoughts (Richards and Martin, 2013), improved ability to manage stress (de Vibe et al., 2013), better functioning of working memory (Jha et al., 2010), improved attention (Moore et al., 2012), and greater cognitive flexibility (Sigel, 2007). Essentially, the practice of mindfulness gives you greater ability and capacity to use your mind in more intentional ways.
Emotional Health
Evidence suggests those who regularly practice mindfulness meditation are better able to emotionally disengage (Ortner et al., 2007). They also have an overall decrease in stress and anxiety (Shapiro et al., 1998). In 2020, Tumminia et al. noted “greater mindfulness is associated with less negative affect and more positive affect.” Researchers have even found that one’s ability to be mindful is correlated with relationship satisfaction (Barnes et al., 2007). Simply put, the practice of mindfulness can help you to better regulate emotions and connect with others.
Physical Health
A meta-analysis of 20 studies (Grossman et al., 2004) found evidence suggesting that mindfulness improved self-reported effects of physical ailments. The study looked at obesity, cancer, fibromyalgia, coronary artery disease, and chronic pain. There is also evidence of improvement in healthy markers of the immune system for those engaged in mindfulness practice (Black and Slavich, 2016). This evidence supports the concept that mindfulness can also help you to manage any current illnesses and prevent future illness.
Mindlessness
Everywhere we look, our focus and attention are rewarded to be anywhere else but in the moment. Electronic devices, social media, and the new car sitting in our neighbor’s driveway demand our attention. Consider the following statistics:
It is estimated the average American hears or sees 4,000 ads a day.
In 2018, Americans looked at their phone an average of 52 times a day.
The average American spends 2 hours and 24 minutes a day on social media.
In 2022, it is estimated that the average American will watch around three hours a day of television.
Consider the consequences of immersion in non-intentional thought and behaviors. By mindlessly allowing so much content to enter our conscious and subconscious mind, we are giving that content the ability to influence our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. As a result, we can feel driven to purchase items we don’t really want. We wear clothing, use words, and do activities that do not necessarily align with our authentic self. This can become a very cyclical pattern which increases our state of mindlessness. We then seek more content for immediate gratification and disconnection from ourselves. In contrast, being mindful can give us a foothold to break that cycle. We can gain better awareness and direction of our thoughts. As a result, we can be the person we want to be. Do the things we want to do. Ultimately, we can feel the way we want to feel.
Learning to change habits through the practice of mindfulness.
Although this seems simple enough on paper, the challenges in actual practice are similar to those we face when making changes in diet or exercise. We know movement and eating more greens are good for us, yet we behave otherwise. There are boundless reasons for this disconnect, so I will not get into those at this time. There is also plenty of information that can be found related to different ways to practice mindfulness. I will instead focus on overcoming some of the barriers I find most commonly keeping us from this important pillar of wellbeing.
Three Tips to Start a Practice of Mindfulness
Play
Seek opportunities to play. Think back to when you were a child – before jobs, relationships, and money, we all innately are born with the ability to get completely lost in play and/or simple pleasures. No matter what was going on around us, we had the ability to find joy in the moment. As we have grown, our busy lifestyles have encouraged our brains to always be active solving problems. Left unchecked, our mind is constantly distracted with these problems. As a result, we form thought, behavior, and emotional patterns that are at odds with the concept of mindfulness. If we can return to old habits of play, we can find peace of mind no matter where we are. Schedule time if you must but make time to get back to the places and things that brought you simple joy as a child.
Effort not outcome
This is a standard suggestion for change, especially when talking mindfulness in counseling sessions. Focus on what you can control – the effort – not on what you are seeking to gain – clear state of mind, less emotional reactivity, reduced stress, etc. All too often we get these mixed up and give up on change too quickly because we are impatient in our efforts. Reward yourself for simply practicing and be pleasantly surprised when the outcomes appear.
Consistency
Consistency and practice are key to building the mindfulness muscle. Author James Clear, in his book Atomic Habits, suggests “the two-minute rule.” In short, you will start by committing to two minutes dedicated towards your practice. If it takes you two minutes to get settled into your position, find and adjust your meditation cushion, or find the right guided meditation, you have completed that day’s practice. The intentionality of the act and building consistency of the cue to be mindful can be the most important step in the process. It is also the easiest step to get tripped up over if we expect/plan to do too much. If we do not get over the first step, there will be no more steps. The more consistently you build the habit of the cue, the more likely you are to lengthen and enhance the rest of the practice.
Need help with mindfulness and/or counseling?
Mindfulness can provide us with the power to improve every aspect of our life. If you find yourself facing barriers that to this healthy habit change that you struggle to overcome, feel free to reach out to discuss your specific situation so that we discuss whether or not counseling is right for you. You can also check out the resources tab for some helpful apps that may also get you moving in the right direction.